so... um...

I was thinking about my name the other day, which led me to think about Edgar Allen Poe, which led me to think about gothic literature which led me to want to write a little something of my own. My life is not very dark however and this caused a bit of a problem for me so I pulled on a little something some of you might be familiar with. I don't really mean any of this so please don't get scared (while i do want you to think it's scary) and don't think that i need help or am contemplating suicide or anything like that. Also, please don't lecture me for writing this. I do however want you to let me know if you think it's any good. again, don't take any of this seriously, i don't mean it, even when it sounds like i might. I was just using it to write. so check it:


They stand and they stare and they laugh in their minds
On their faces expressions of fear and of cries
You can tell so precisely when you look in their eyes
It's a show to them to watch you fall down on the floor
to bang your head violently up against a board
It's funny to them as the blood starts to pour
and your eyes rolling back to see inside your skull.
"How bout next time you try it as you drive?
We'll see if you crash and make it out alive."
They place bets and gamble and see who will win
and they pretend to care with their quiet chagrin.
All they want is the blood and the guts and the gore
and when mine runs out they will still beg for more.
How bout if they die? That'll even the score!
As if the pain that I feel when I fall ain't enough
the shame they throw on me makes me want to bust.
to burst out in tears and release every word
and place them in a verbal world of hurt.
Then I'll stand and I'll stare and I'll laugh in their face
as I see them there flopping in my usual place.


I became insane with long intervals of terrible sanity. - Edgar Allen Poe

Apparently Edgar Allen Poe had epilepsy too! So, that was pretty cool to find that out. Pretty sweet :P

Ya pronto!

Ya pronto voy a regresar a la tierra que amo. MEXICO! Guadalajara, Jalisco para ser mas especifico. Si Dios quiere, alli voy a estar para Navidad con mis primos, primas, tios y tias! La ultima vez que fui, me di cuenta que me estaba haciendo un poco racista contra la gente Estado-Unidence. Porque? Bueno, es que el avion en el cual andavamos viajando iva directamente a Guadalajara, y no iva a hacer ninguna parada en otro lugar (como Cabo San Lucas, o Mazatlan, o lo que sea) y me enoje! Pense "Estos gueros deberian de ir a los lugares turisticos! No pueden ir a el Mexico verdadero! Guadalajara es mio y solo mio! No voy a permitir que estos 'turistas' invadan mi tierra!" Claro, no les iva a hacer nada. Ni modo que los agarrara a golpes, pero me sentia enfurecido! En ese momento me puse a reflejar. Me estaba haciendo como los locos de la imigracion americana. En vez de enojarme porque ivan a el Mexico "verdadero", deberia de estar feliz que ivan a ver la VERDADERA belleza de Mexico, y no los lugares feos y aterrorizantes donde acostumbran ir... siempre y cuando no agarren la costumbre de ir todos a Guadalajara y vivir alli. Eso ya seria mucho. Pero les doy permiso de ir a visitar a esos gueritos :) No quiero que la gente vaya a algun lugar rascuacho por alli y juzgen a toda la nacion pensando que Mexico es un lugar feo. La verdad es que a mi me gusta muchisisimo mas andar en Mexico que estar aqui en los Estados Unidos Americanos. Con esto no quiero parecer traidor ni nada por el estilo, pero, esa es la verdad :) Abajo, inclui algunas fotos de Guadalajra para que vean un poco del hermoso lugar de donde viene mi familia! Enjoy!

Hospicio Cabañas

Arcos de Guadalajara



Plaza Galerias (like a mall)

 

Cathedral



Mural by Joze Orozco



My heart

 

About friends.

So thanksgiving came and went... once again. I give thanks for everyone and everything and yada-yada so on so forth (we all know what we're thankful for ;) but THIS thanksgiving was a little different. See, a great friend of mine came up here from So-Cal and it had been eight (ocho, huit, acht, 8!) years since i last saw him. He moved away when I was 12, enlisted in the Marines when he turned 18 and served two tours in the middle east and now has a beautiful baby girl and a wife, but the curiosity of all this is that when he came back, we started talking and hanging out and it seemed like he had never even left at all :D despite how vehemently our lives had changed, how much all of us had grown and matured, we were still just as good friends as the day he left. I think that's the proof of a real, genuine friendship. the trust that remains between friends despite the passing of distance and time. my friend came and went and i still trust that guy with my life (and thank him for fighting for it over in the middle east). I guess what i'm trying to say here... well, i'm not really trying to say anything. I just wanted to write about this. We all have friends (I hope) and as you're reading this blog, i'm sure you're thinking about that friend of yours that can leave for 100 years and when they come back, the friendship would be just as strong. I thank God for my friends, and even though we are now in December, it's never too late to do so. Make sure you give your friend a call soon to say "what's up?" because you never know when one of you might be gone for good... i guess THEN it would be too late.

oh and just for laughs, check out the following:

A New Blog!? Say "WHA!?"

say it! just kidding, you don't have to :) ... this time >:-( that's an angry face. Okay, last sunday (yesterday) our church youth group had a meeting and we developed certain administrative groups such as: activity planning, fundraising, bulletin-board care taker, etc. I became part of the activity planning crew with Jorge and Priscilla so you know we're gonna have some awesome activities! First of all, we decided to plan out a christmas banquet and gift exchange. Whether that will be a secret-santa or white elephant ordeal is yet to be determined (I wanna keep you guys in suspense), but aside from that, we are developing other ideas as well. We are going to be planning a snow trip toward the end of the year and I have been getting in contact with other churches to see where there will be other youth services because we wanna get involved in that. We also want to go to some concerts and even if we don't go to all of them, we at least would like to know about them and have them up on our bulletin board. We've been laggin on this kinda stuff for a while now as a group but we're gonna be picking up slack once again. Aside from that, we are building a sweet youth center downstairs at church. It's gonna be sick! We're gonna have like a little cafe thing going on down there, a little lounge with a couch (like the ones from drama, sara and suzy ;) and there's gonna be this wall there that WE (the youth) are gonna paint however we want and make it all colorful and tag it with our names and what not, basically pimp it out. We have a t.v. in there too that we could hook up video games to (not that us guys would, just saying that we could huh isai?) Enough of that for now though. Also on Sunday, a few of us got together and watched a movie in the Stockton Downtown Theatre. The guys watched 2012 and the girls watched... what else. twilight. I'm not even gonna comment on that. As far as 2012, i don't wanna turn this into a movie review but i will say this. If you've seen "Day After Tomorrow" then you've seen 2012. It is entertaining though, I'm not knocking it. All i'm saying is, if you have 10 extra bucks, "The Men Who Stare At Goats"might be a more enjoyable movie. At least it was for me :)

My Movie Update (for whoever cares): Still taking care of casting. Making phone calls and what not. This is getting to be really stressful but I know it will be worth it. OH! That brings up a whole 'nother topic for me to blog about but maybe later this week.

FEEL FREE TO COMMENT EVERYONE! Any suggestions for the activities crew? What about movies? Seen any lately? ... at least wish me luck with mine.

peace.

Heaven???

I desire to write about this topic, realizing that there may be many people that may come across it and try to contradict it or who will disagree with what I am saying but I have restricted my true self for too long now and now I must talk. Since the age of 6 years old, my family and I began attending an Apostolic Church in Riverbank, CA. I was baptized of my own accord in the name of Jesus Christ like the bible says we should (Acts 2:38). Since then, I continued to go to church and have been for my entire life. However, at around the age of 13 I stopped growing spiritually. I was not fulfilling my duties as both a chrisitan and as a son of God (2nd Timothy 4:1-2) I started becoming more leniant with myself and my walk with God. The music I listened to was not music that praised God. It was filled with curse words and violence. I didn't read my Bible or fast. I didn't include God in my daily life and I didn't even invite my friends to church anymore. I wasn't ashamed of my religion, because if I was asked, I would immediately respond "I am a christian" but it it is now embarrassing to me that I had to be asked in order for people to find out. I mean, we are supposed to be the light of the world! (Matthew 5:14-16) It should be obvious that we are christians! Over the past two years I have started getting closer to God again and it is time to start talking about this stuff. The end of days is near guys! There is no time to be flirting with sin or dealing with the things of God halfways. It's not enough to be nice and say "oh I don't drink or smoke and I'm a good person, that's all I need". it's not even enough to say "oh i'm spiritual and i take the best from all religions" The fact of the matter is, it takes a lot to go to heaven. One must repent and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ and understand that He is the way, the truth, and the life (John 14:6) and live according to HIS word. Many times, the difficult part for people is figuring out if He is real or not. Are we just a bunch of lunatics? Let me tell you something, He is definitely REAL!!! I have seen people that have been healed from cancer that go back to the doctor the next day and are surprised about how suddenly there is nothing there! I've seen people who were completely lost in gangs and drugs and violence (people who killed!) start crying like children and turn over their life to God. I've even seen people who were demon possessed (because yes, the devil exists too) be liberated by the spirit of God. When you see those types of things, there is no room for doubt. Aside from that, God has also blessed me with the ability to speak in other tongues (Acts 2:4). There would be no need for me to lie about this stuff to everyone. Trust me, if this was a lie, I would be the first one to step away from it and not tell anyone to get into it, but it has proven to be the most real thing in my life! To have a God that is always there for me no matter how many times i may fall, that can do all things if i just ask (Luke 11:9). A loving God and merciful God that wants to be there for you too! He died for YOU on the cross.(Romans 6:23) Through God's mercy, you don't have to pay or suffer from the mistakes you've made! You just have to let Him work with you and repent and give your life to Him. Mark my words, it will only get better (John 10:10) To those who have already given your life to God, I would like to encourage you to keep growing! Don't let the trials of life get in your way! God is on your side and with Him, nothing can stop you! (Isaiah 54:17) Look around you. Our morals are gone, trouble is everywhere, nothing is sacred. It is obvious that this is the LAST generation and that undoubtedly God is coming soon!!! I am excited, and I hope that you are prepared! I have a lot to improve on, but with God's help, I'll be going home soon :)

What is this "Economy" doing? up or down?

I have, for the past 3-4 months or so, made an attempt to move into investing. Why? Well, I like money. The best things in life may be free, but the "pretty good" stuff still costs money. Investing is defined as: To commit (money or capital) in order to gain a financial return. Urbandictionary.com had no witty definition for it, therefore I was coerced into using the real one. It is appalingly clear that the U.S. has been undergoing the worst market crisis since the Great Depression. We see foreclosures in every neighborhood, jobs being lost (NYC lost nearly 60k jobs since the year 2000 in communications alone) reduced work hours, and less consumer spending. Despite all these appalling numbers, there are no bread lines, many still have their homes, some women continue to shop at whatever fancy store may be in style for the current 3 month span (okay, I exaggerate. Month and 1/2 :p). The stock market seems to be doing the same thing. It has ignored the current status of the country and those sad statistics and become an incredible bull market! The Dow has been closing at all time highs! Many have bought into this action which ideally, should have been bought into sometime around March (and I advise selling soon). However, experts have been predicting that soon the market will turn and the little guys with high hopes and little experience (I am in this category, though luckily I didn't have enough money to buy into it in the firsrt place) wil be left holding the bag. Beware of what the economy is going through and what you do in stocks because it can quite litereally make you or break you. Don't be afraid, just be aware! Comment and let me know your thoughts on this matter. Are we still in a slump? What do you think about many of these so called experts? How do you feel about our Secretary of Treasury Tim Geithner and his wonderful plans?

Links to check out:

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/Stronger-dollar-weak-economic-apf-3017726482.html?x=0

http:/finance.yahoo.com/news/The-Real-Jobless-Rate-175-Of-cnbc-1855719550.html?x=0&sec=topStories&pos=1&asset=&code=

p.s. haha sarah!

Ladies and Gentlemen

Due to popular consensus I have created a blogspot. Why you say? I'll tell you why. Popular consensus. My first post will be about movies. According to many sources (though i only actually checked one website) the first "movie" ever made was a set of motion photography made by Eadweard Muybridge of a galloping horse. Essentially like those little booklets you used to make when you were little. Where you make a bunch of little drawings on separate pages, each one slightly different than the other and then flip through it really fast and at the end the poor little guy either blows up or falls off of a cliff... kinda morbid ain't it? Anyway, over the years filmmaking has evolved in an incredible fashion. Over time, filming has gone through: a silent era, propaganda-filled films in the 1940's (WWII), the take over of technicolor, and many other things, always reinventing itself and transforming the world around it. It is actually a very interesting art and much more difficult than many would imagine. Many talented directors, actors, and writers have revolutionized the art and influenced all who would come after them. Directors such as Kubrick, Felini, Scorcese, and Gilliam. Actors like Johnny Depp, Charlie Chaplin, Orson Welles, Denzel Washington, and Charlize Theron. I am currently in the process of making a movie that I wrote with the sole intention of getting into the Dallas International Film Festival after I met the CEO, Michael Caine, at a different film festival. It's a long-ish story. I am currently in the process of holding auditions for my movie to be held on December 5th. I'll keep you posted!


"Photography is truth. The cinema is truth 24 times per second." - Jean-Luc Godard




Be sure to comment! What kind of movies do you like? Which actors/writers/directors would you say are the greatest?